Things the Internet Teaches Me: Jesus is a Pelican

Today's lecture consists of Television: Part III and the introduction of INTERNET.

Today's blog post does not.

Sadly, Micah is not with me today. Nor is he texting me back, so his reason for leaving me alone is simply left to my imagination. I assume his espresso machine sprayed hot, caffeinated liquid in his now scalded eyes. Hopefully he purchases an eye patch and comes to class next Tuesday.

This post will probably not be as entertaining as the previous, due to the fact I am really trying to pay attention in class now so I can have an "A" and not a "B."

Did you know every early video clip about the rise and significance of internet was made by "nerds" and "dweebs" who did not just wear giant glasses or flaunt gapped teeth, they did BOTH simultaneously.

I am a wee bit distraught for I cannot find Scarface or Cheats or BedHead anymore. I only ever find FratDouche, and he seems to have dunked himself into a vat of douchery.

So, I recently finalized my list of top 5 favorite animals. I thought I had the top 6 in order, but I'm still confused about flamingos and weasels. Anyway, one of the top 5 is a pelican. Yes, the bird with the throat pouch. Do not ever ask why any of my favorite animals are my favorite, they just are. So just a minute ago I decided to look up pelicans on the internet and find out what the heck makes them better than every other large water bird. I found a shockingly interesting bit of information. Pelicans were/are sometimes considered religious symbols because when the baby pelicans are hungry and there is no food, the mommy pelican might sometimes stab her own bird-boob and allow her young to drink her breast-blood. Gross, but so intriguing. People made connections from this self-mutilating-for-the-good-of-another bird to our lord and savior Jesus Christ. Weird, huh?

I wish I had a brain which could retain a lot of intelligent stuff. I would want to be a hacker. Then I could become the next Gates or Zuckerberg. The whole idea behind "Internet" and the way it works is just fascinating. I can hardly wrap my mind around http and html, but it is so amazing to hear about the evolution and innovation of Internet and the WWW.

Have you had enough of my rambling?

If you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all.

You have bad parents.

Let's explore one more topic: Autumn

Okay, let's face it...your opinion doesn't matter. Unless you agree with this statement: Autumn (or "Fall" for you imbeciles) is the best season of the year. The reasons include things such as wearing sweaters, drinking warm and delicious drinks, holidays, wearing striped sweaters, parties, amazing scents at Bath & Body Works, wearing soft and beautiful sweaters, pie, and so much more!

Thank you for participating.

You're all gorgeous.