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Thursday, October 20, 2011

"Penetration is a legit technical term"- Professor X

Doctor X is tackling gaming, online poker, and porn this class period. A.K.A. the internet. Every second $3,075.64 is being spent on porn. There's an industry for you.

"Adam and Eve makes me uncomfortable, and its not even porn! Its just a store that tells dirty stuff" poor professor X... to combat his weakness he's making us watch documentaries on porn- how Journalistic.

The internet was driven by porn, as Yahoo CEO states... "My customers wanna see sex, I'll give it to 'em" this documentary is kinky... Wow the internet is freakin' me out. Dani says "I'm a geek with big breasts", this is awkward. Worse than the time I accidentally let slip the words "yeast infection" to my female substitute teacher- which was bad.

Wow, it seems like this porn thing is driving the world. This is scary. Why do we have to LEARN this?! I'm pretty sure we all suspected it, but to create scientific studies documenting it... now the aliens will know whats up!

Apparently porn is now a teenage rebellion- according to the old people.

Back to professor X- "Penetration is a legit technical term", oh innuendo, how you entertain! However, I must disagree with this viewpoint. When you use the word "penetration" I can no longer take you technically serious- at least not until the giggling subsides.

In 2002 there were over 200,000 pornography businesses online. This number has skyrocketed from there- how would anybody watch that much porn and still be part of society? Yeah I don't know.

Ooh yeah! Society backlashed towards porn, heaven forbid we let the children see this stuff! Lets make internet filters and software blockers! Hell! Why not also make chats for children, they can't see porn, but they can be cyber bullied in a safe environment!

Why is it that our stuck up frat boy is taking copious notes suddenly? He never takes notes! But today his eyes are dialed in, he doesn't want to miss a single bit of sensuous clip art from the powerpoint. Sleazy bastard... I should copy his notes, I haven't been taking them today- the powerpoint is way too riveting.

"We're gonna stop talking about porn" says Professor X; "awww" says the frat boy and every other guy in the class. The women don't say anything- ominous. Hmm, Professor X is talking about blogging now. I hate blogging. Bloggers are so lame. They just spout stupid opinions and assume everybody else should listen. I also hate happiness. People who're happy are douches. Happy people should be sent searching for landmines- with hammers.

Hammers are fun though. I like hammers.

But any who- this lecture is penetrating into my soul, deep stuff, gotta love it.

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